Morning Musing on Shouting Down Your Bully
Luvlies, Good morning. I don’t know if you follow me on Patreon (you should), but I kvetched about a bully I encountered at my favourite dance studio last week. Yes, a grown woman tried some outdated tactics of intimidation, which I shot down loudly and with a quickness.
Ballet has always had a bullying problem. Whether it was from an instructor calling their students fat, or belittling dancers for not training at 130% every class; it’s why there has been less and less funding given to ballet institutions YoY. There is unnecessary trauma within the dance community. It’s a space where the fragility of an artist is glaringly apparent, which is why it attracts narcissists and the belligerent. It’s a place where all the -ISMs thrive. Where the passive aggressive can be violent under the guise of the art form… but never on my watch.
Ever since I was little I could never be bullied by anyone, especially a dance teacher. I also spoke up whenever someone was being bullied. It may or may not have ended with a handful of someone’s hair in my hand, or a karate-kick-to-the-chest induced asthma attack, but that’s a story for another day.
In the dance and gymnastics world, the bullies were palm coloured weaklings who weaponized their whiteness or thinness or daddy’s money, but could never stand on their ability. Whenever they would start acting up and criticize some part of my body or insult my colouring, I would look the ballet bear in the face, get very big, and ROAR.
Whenever the bully would insult the way I moved or my near perfect form, I’d say ‘Show me exactly how you want it to look’. Most of these fc*king hags could barely touch their toes or get their legs to 90º, so they would feel foolish when they were insulting someone whose ability they could not match.
That’s one way you combat a bully.
With the situation from last week, the bully was anti-black, and targeted me specifically for an imaginary infraction she thought I committed against her: simply being in her presence with my camera. There were other girls filming in the class, but she chose me to reprimand and threaten.
Luvlies, I didn’t even get off the floor to address her. She came at me pointing and using an old lady voice, but I’m an old lady too and have very intimidating long arms and fingers. So I pointed and snapped right back, spoke to her like the misbehaving animal she was.
BITCH. HEEL.
She backed away, and the bully was left holding her shitty attitude with both hands.
Then I proceeded to out jump her, and out turn her the rest of the class.
Talented people don’t bully. Focused people don’t bully either.
Bullies know that no one would pay to see them perform. Bullies know when they’re the ones who aren’t qualified to be in the room. Bullies get angry when their foolishness is matched or mocked. Bullies don’t like to be reminded they’re less than, and nobody likes them.
So for those of us who deal with bullies on the regular, take the low road. Do not internalize their BS.
Let them know their mommas never loved them, and they have bad breath.
…and that’s time. Still here? Leave your tips on how you handle a bully down below.
See you soon Luvlies!
xoxo Luv Laney Luv
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Morning Musing is a pomodoro-timed, free thought experiment to get back into the swing of things. No Ai added.
